When Bu found out, she was more interested in blaming her cousin than in ensuring that her son was all right!

A child isn't an animal you pass from home to home. Her son deserves better treatment from his mother. I can't understand people like that. They should be locked up for the rest of their lives.

JR

Dear JR,

Bu didn't tell me much about herself in the letter, but I have the feeling that she is quite young. Locking her up wouldn't teach her anything. It certainly wouldn't teach her the responsibility she needs to ensure the well being of her child.

Dear Khun Melanee,

I am "Bu", the one who wrote you last week about my son. I just want to say that you were unfair to me. I take care of my son very well. All my friends say so.

Of course my new husband and I rushed home when my cousin told me what happened. My boy is okay now, but I blame my cousin for making my little boy suffer like this. I thought if you wrote that she wasn't a good person, I could send her your column so she could understand what she did. You never said anything about her. Why are you blaming me for what happened? I did everything I could for my son.

Bu

Dear Khun Bu,

My dear, blaming you or blaming your cousin won't help anything. I'm glad to hear that you took care of your son as soon as you learned of the treatment he was receiving. As you said, you hadn't mentioned that in your letter.

As for your cousin, I want to say this: She couldn't have suddenly started treating children badly. You must have noticed some signs earlier that she was not the best person to take care of your son. So, please stop trying to blame her. She has her own weaknesses to deal with. Instead, try and ensure that your son is never hurt this way again. You need to find friends whom you can trust.

Melanee,

What a prude you are! "Pla" says that a farang woman who works in her company shows her rear every time she squats. What's the big deal? It's not the worst thing this woman could do. She isn't killing anyone. The earth will continue travelling around the sun, with or without the sight of her derriere.

Melanee, you need to get a life. Of course this girl knows that her backside is showing! That's why girls wear these jeans. One hopes that at least she's attractive. The real crime would be if she had an ugly body. Yuck!

LT

Dear LT,

I have nothing against a woman displaying her body, but it seems to me that an office is not the right place for some displays. What's attractive at a reception or in a pub is not so attractive when you're filing papers.

Of course, what's happening is not a big thing, but it is making other people in the office uncomfortable. Revealing one's backside is not part of the Thai culture, and I doubt that many Thai women would wear clothes that show so much.

Dear Khun Melanee,

That letter from "Pla" about a farang woman showing her rear when she bends over has reminded me of a problem we have in my office. One of our new colleagues loves to wear perfume. It's so heavy that we know where she's been hours after she's left the room.

How can we tell her that she shouldn't put on so much? We don't want to make her feel bad. Her perfume is very expensive and, if she didn't put on so much, I think it would smell very nice.

ST

Dear ST,

The easiest way is to use the same plan I suggested last week to Pla. When she's with a group of you, just talk about someone else who works in another company and who disturbs her colleagues by putting on too much perfume.

I don't think the problem will continue, though. Lots of women who lack self-confidence tend to overdo their perfume. When your colleague doesn't feel so new, she'll probably cut her perfume usage.

Problems that Melanee can advise you on? Fax (02) 751 4446, or e-mail her at melaneepetra@hotmail.com

By Melanee petra