Published on January 31, 2005

I’ve watched with disgust as gigs become more acceptable in Thai society, creeping in like a malign disease. A gig is the local slang for a fun partner on the side of a steady relationship, but one who is short of being a boyfriend or girlfriend.

The most deplorable revelation about gig proliferation is that the instigators are usually female.

Adulterous men don’t have gigs – they have affairs. This means that gigs, even though the term applies to either sex, are mostly silly males who don’t know how to do better.

The girl will go on secret dates with her gig, but the interaction is usually limited to first-date activity. It involves a lot of romancing, perhaps a kiss, and for the really modern types, maybe sex.

Most of the time, the girl only needs someone else to talk to since she’s already bored with the conversations she has with her real boyfriend.

It will never evolve into a long-term relationship and could end at any time. The gig must understand this or the gig-ship is immediately over.

In a society as conservative as Thailand’s, the gig plague was a phenomenon just waiting to rear its ugly head among morally depraved modern women.

Certain groups of modern Thai women, especially teens to mid-20s, are looking to break out of these conservative bonds. They want to experience a range of choices, like the guys.

The only problem with Thai women wanting to be as adulterous as us Thai men is that they can’t do it with courage and conviction. This is where the gig fits in.

With her steady boyfriend, a woman is perceived as conservative. But in her own secret world, known only to her closest friends, she can bolster her vanity by carrying out her wildest fantasies of romance and adventure with someone who has qualities her steady boyfriend usually lacks.

Having an affair used to be a no-no for girls, but ever since the gig appeared, getting some action on the side has become something to be proud of. When her boyfriend finds out, she’ll usually try to get out of trouble by saying, “Well, it was only a gig.”

This is sickening. It goes against all the principles of having an affair. It shows how the modern Thai girl wants the best of both worlds without having to risk anything.

How she can treat another human being as though he had no flesh, blood or feelings is beyond me.

Even the least optimistic of gigs secretly hopes that, one day, he might be upgraded to the status of real boyfriend. This is why he spends valuable time and money romancing the girl.

A gig’s status is even lower than a mia noi (mistress), since they give everything and gain nothing, apart from the girl’s temporary company.

This is the lowliest form of modern relationship, and despite the excuses semantics might provide, we should all be wary about getting into such a mess.

Comments on this column can be sent to relations@nationgroup.com.

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